


Bad days (trans!tommy au)

by noodles_07



Category: Video Blogging RPF, tommyinnit - Fandom, uhm I don't know what other fandoms to put this in
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Coming Out, Gen, Gender Dysphoria, Hurt/Comfort, I was just ~sad~ ~dysphoric~ and ~projecting~, Phil and Techno are also here, Supportive Wilbur Soot, TommyInnit - Freeform, Trans Male Character, Trans TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Trans tommy finally has a tag and I’m so proud, Wilbur Soot - Freeform, also I literally just copy/pasted it from openoffice to ao3, inspired by solace404's trans!tommy au, there may or may not be more idek yet man, this is a ventfic I wrote in the notes app at 1 am don't expect anything good, this is literally just 1-am sad boi vent, this will obv be deleted if Tommy is uncomfy with this kind of fic, unedited
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:01:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28001316
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noodles_07/pseuds/noodles_07
Summary: This is literally an unedited ventfic I wrote in dysphoric suffering at 1-am please don't expect quality contentBasically Tommy is sad and dysphoric and comes out to Wilbur
Relationships: Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit, it's all platonic ya fucks
Comments: 18
Kudos: 767
Collections: Completed stories I've read





	Bad days (trans!tommy au)

**Author's Note:**

> This is heavily inspired by Solace404's trans!tommy fics! Please go check them out!

Tommy curled his knees up to his chest, ignoring the pang of discomfort the simple movement gave in favor of the comfort of having something to hug, of being hugged.

His phone pinged with a discord notification, so he halfheartedly dug it out from the nest of covers to look.

@WilburSoot: @Tommyinnit wanna hop in the vc? We’re planning an among us stream l8er

Tommy buried his face in his hands, dropping the phone onto his pillow. He didn’t think he could stand the sound of his own voice right now. Normally he could cope with his voice on streams, keeping it a few octaves lower than usual and playing up all the ‘masculine’ hints his natural voice had, but on days like this having to deepen his voice was just a reminder of how he’d been born. Wrong.

He couldn’t let his friends down, though. And maybe talking to them, being seen for who he really was in a way his family could never achieve, would help.

@Tommyinnit: only if I can do it from my bed

A man had his limits, after all, and getting up was one of them.

@WilburSoot: yeah u can if u want

Tommy pressed the button to join the vc, listening to the general chatter- it was just his friends, Phil and Wilbur and Tubbo and Techno- as he snuggled deeper into his blanket nest.

“Hey Tommy!” Tubbo was the first to notice the soft ding noise of Tommy joining the vc.

“Ey big T” he greeted halfheartedly, cringing at how shrill his voice seemed to his own ears.

“Toms, are you feeling alright?” Phil chimed. “Wilbur said you were staying in bed and you don’t sound too great.”

Tommy bit his lip sharply, almost tasting blood. “I’m alright. When were you thinking for the among us stream?”

If the others noticed how quickly he changed the subject- they did- they didn’t call him out.

The next few minutes were spent deciding on a time, deciding who else would b invited (CORPSE, 5up, and YetiApocalypse all ended up in the invite list) and the general buzz of friends getting distracted every other sentence.

Tommy was mostly quiet, only speaking up when someone directed a question at him. It was, surprisingly, Technoblade who called him out on it first. “You’re awful quiet, Tommy.”

Tommy forced himself to laugh, hating the feeling of his shirt scraping against his chest. “I’m just tired big man, don’t worry about me.”

Techno audibly snorted and Wilbur cut in. “Don’t even pull that card, it’s like 11 am there and you passed out on call with me last night” 

Tommy shifted uncomfortably, instantly regretting it as his jeans rubbed against his legs. “I promise I’m fine guys. Can we let it go?”

“We’re not gonna force you to talk about anything,” Phil said softly, “but if you need anything, anything at all from us just let us know, okay?”

Tommy nodded before registering that they couldn’t see him and trying again. “Yeah. Thanks Phil.”

-

The among us stream was set to be happening in five minutes, but Tommy could barely drag himself out of bed. One (painful) look in the mirror told him that he absolutely didn’t have time to pull himself together. His hair was a mess, his shirt was ruffled and clinging to all the wrong spots, and his cheeks were blotchy from tears he hadn’t noticed.

He couldn’t exactly dip on the stream, though. Maybe he could play the broken facecam card and buy himself a little time?

He trekked down the stairs to consume a bowl of cereal in record time and grabbed a granola bar for the road, forcing himself to ignore his parents using the wrong words and the wrong name as he quickly explained he had a stream and dashed upstairs, taking them two at a time.

He sank into his desk chair and took a moment to find the most comfortable position, settling for half-curled sideways, and clicked the key to join the very full vc.

“Ayy, Tommy’s here!” Wilbur greeted as he sent the code to the main gc again to let Tommy quickly join.

“Hey Wil”

He deafened to explain to chat about his ‘buggy’ facecam, saying that he’d work on it tomorrow but he’d been busy today, and hopped back to the game right as the first round started. Crewmate. He could work with that, it’d be a nice warmup.

He forced himself to talk to chat, dramatically slamming his hands on his desk when he was murdered- by TUBBO, of all people! “Betrayed by my best friend!”- and answering donos as he finished his tasks and stalked Tubbo from the afterlife.

-

“Tommy?” Wilbur asked once they’d both signed off, pulling him into a private vc. “Can we talk for a second?”

Tommy licked his lips. “Yeah, what’s up?”

“Okay, feel free to shut me down if I’m prying, but are you sure you’re alright? You’ve been rather subdued all day, and you didn’t use a facecam, and normally if you have a cold or something you just explain and move on, so I wanted to check in.”

“One sec” was all Tommy said, switching discord from his pc to phone and throwing himself back into bed and buying himself time to think.

He knew Wilbur would be fine with it, there were compilations of him saying trans rights on YouTube and tiktok that Tommy went to regularly for comfort, but at the same time that little part of his brain couldn’t stop whispering the what if’s.  
“Toms?”

Fuck, how long had he been sitting there not talking? There were tears running down his face, and he suppressed a sob at the sound of Wilbur’s voice.

“I’m just- I’m really fuckin dysphoric today, Wil.” And there it was, he’d said it. Now it was Wil’s turn to decide how to respond.

There was a tapping on his door and he jolted upright, shouting “I’m still love, mum!” as Wilbur thought over his words.

“Oh Toms, is there anything I can do?” Tommy was fighting loud sobs now, pressing his face into his pillow.

“I don’t think so, Wil. I’ve had days like this before, it’ll pass it’s just- really fucking hard.”

“Okay.. please let me know if I can help at all. Do you mind if I ask a couple questions, or would you rather go to bed?”

“You can- can ask questions. I’m gonna have to get used to that anyway.”

“Shut me down if I say anything that you’re not okay with, Toms. Does this... mean that you’re transgender?”

“Yup.” he hated how scratchy his voice was, tears audible through the phone.

“Are you male-to-female or female-to-male?”

“FTM. Biologically female, identify as a guy.”

“Alright. Are you... out to anybody else?”

“Nope. Not even my parents know yet.”

“Oh Toms... I’m always here for you if you need it you know, big man? Even if it’s like four in the goddamn morning you can ring me and I’ll be there. I... can’t say I know what it’s like, but I want to help you in any ways I can, okay?”

Tommy nodded and hiccuped a yes, full-on sobbing at this point.

Wilbur kept talking, softly, about everything and nothing, until Tommy found himself dozing off to the sound of his voice.

**Author's Note:**

> Please comment adhd brain demands dopamine but be nice to me
> 
> also wow I hate how I ended this but I promised myself no editing so this is what ya get


End file.
